meatloaf for a large family gathering: a follow-up to the comedown

my perplexed yet undeniable fascination by the complexities of humankind (read "who i am") is confirmed in the following article from Discovery News. Glad I'm not alone in my thinking...

How Visiting Your Family Warps Your Brain
Jennifer Viegas, Discovery News

Visiting -- or even just viewing photos of family members -- prompts brain activity that affects how you feel about them, your friends, and even yourself, a new study suggests. The study is the first to compare brain activity associated with seeing relatives with that linked to seeing friends and strangers. It suggests our feelings about biological relatives are at least somewhat primal. The findings may help explain everything from why our family can get on our nerves to why people who look like us can spark immediate feelings of trust, "but not lust," said Steven Platek, who co-authored the study with Shelly Kemp. "We like to be around people that look more like us, but we do not find them as sexually attractive," added Platek, editor-in-chief of the journal Frontiers in Evolutionary Neuroscience. "I think it is linked to our subconscious ability to detect facial resemblances so we avoid lusting after those that may be related to us."

For the study, the researchers performed MRI brain scans on test subjects viewing images of biological relatives, friends, strangers, themselves and various morphed images. The scientists found that relatives and self-lookalikes are processed through a self-referential part of the brain. Friends and strangers who look nothing like the viewer, on the other hand, light up entirely different areas of the brain, those linked to making important and risky decisions with respect to the self.
The findings are published in the latest issue of the journal Neuropsychologia.

Platek and Kemp also found that the brain ranks everyone socially, with relatives at the head of the line. "I think facial resemblance is ranked right up there in importance with attractiveness," Platek said. Since relatives are processed through areas of the brain linked to self-reference, the study could also help to explain why relatives cause us to take things personally. While we may tolerate a friend's loud laughter or snoring, for example, we may have less patience with a relative because we judge them similarly to how we judge ourselves. "This research is a wonderful example of the fruitfulness of conducting cognitive neuroscience informed by evolutionary theory," said Todd Shackelford, a professor of psychology at Florida Atlantic University. "I am hopeful that other researchers in the cognitive neurosciences will follow Dr. Platek's lead and take full advantage of the predictive power of a Darwinian perspective on the design of the structure of the mind," he told Discovery News. It's likely, he explained, that a face we perceive as "friendly" is one that looks more like us. But how we later feel about that person could be tied to how we feel about ourselves, perhaps explaining the prevalence of arguments during family reunions and holiday gatherings.

meatloaf for a large family gathering (best served with alcohol)

ingredients
1/2 cup finely chopped onions
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup finely chopped red pepper
1 1/2 cups bread crumbs
2/3 cups cream
2 eggs (beaten)
1 1/4 pounds ground beef
3/4 pounds Italian sausage, casings removed
1/2 teaspoon dried sage
1/2 teaspoon dried thyme
1/2 teaspoon black pepper
mustard glaze, recipe follows

directions

preheat oven to 350 degrees fahrenheit. combine all ingredients in large mixing bowl and mix for about ten minutes. place meatloaf in loaf pan. make mustard glaze.

mustard glaze:
1/2 cup mustard
1 tablespoon brown sugar
1/4 teaspoon cider vinegar

in a small bowl, mix all the ingredients together. pour over meatloaf.

cook for 1 1/2 hours.

the comedown

and now i am on vacation.

after almost a week of time with relatives, i am so thankful to have time back for myself. and then i think of all the people who are only by themselves and would love to spend time with relatives. the grass is always greener.

i had a great holiday spending time with loved ones but boy can those loved ones rub raw nerves. is that their purpose in life? to love you so much but continue to nag, suggest, impose guilt, blahblahblah? at what point do parents truly sit back and enjoy what they've created without asserting their parental rights, so to speak? is this everyone's cycle? i keep saying that if everyone was the same--thought the same, acted the same--it sure would be a boring world. it seems funny, then, that parents want children to be themselves but at the same time want them conform to family traditions, share similar opinions and points of view, follow their suggestions, blahblahblah. and as parents age they sure do get more stubborn. and as children age they sure do want the best for their parents. and the stubborness becomes a great challenge.

if anyone has any suggestions on how to become less affected by parents of all ages, i'm all ears.

until then here's a recipe for twice-baked aged goat cheese souffles with mixed greens

ingredients
1/2 pound aged (firm) goat cheese
4 large eggs
3 1/2 tablespoons unsalted butter
1/3 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/3 cups whole milk
2 teaspoons Dijon mustard
2 teaspoons finely chopped fresh thyme leaves
3/4 cup heavy cream

accompaniment: salad greens tossed with vinaigrette

preparation

preheat oven to 375°F and butter six 3/4-cup ramekins (3 3/4 by 2 inches). crumble goat cheese and separate eggs. in a saucepan melt butter over moderately low heat and whisk in flour. cook roux, whisking, 3 minutes and whisk in milk. bring mixture to a boil, whisking constantly, and simmer, whisking occasionally, 3 minutes. remove pan from heat and add yolks, mustard, 1 teaspoon thyme, two thirds cheese, and salt and pepper to taste, whisking until cheese is melted. transfer yolk mixture to a large bowl.

in another large bowl with an electric mixer beat whites with a pinch salt until they just hold stiff peaks. stir one fourth whites into yolk mixture to lighten and fold in remaining whites and remaining cheese gently but thoroughly.

divide soufflé mixture among ramekins and arrange in a large baking pan just large enough to hold them. add enough hot water to baking pan to reach halfway up sides of ramekins. bake soufflés in middle of oven until slightly puffed and golden brown, about 20 minutes, and transfer to a rack. let soufflés stand, uncovered, 30 minutes (soufflés will fall slightly).

lightly butter a baking sheet. run a thin knife around edges of soufflés. invert each soufflé onto palm of your hand and carefully put, right side up, onto baking sheet. soufflés may be made up to this point 2 days ahead and chilled, covered.

increase temperature to 425°F.

in a small saucepan bring cream with remaining teaspoon thyme and salt and pepper to taste to a boil. remove pan from heat and keep cream warm, covered. bake soufflés in middle of oven until slightly puffed and heated through, about 5 minutes.

transfer soufflés to plates. Spoon 2 tablespoons cream over each soufflé and arrange salad decoratively alongside.

here's to the irish

i have been too busy to post lately; but out of the need for blog therapy am doing so. i have also decided to divide my life in half--home and everything else. home life is great! the house-buying thing is moving along, i am madly in love, i am enjoying creativity, etcetcetc. the everything else would include things like finding a way to early retirement, the economy, oh and severe neck pain! now the everything else isn't horrible, but it's not great; and i'll give you the recap...

i awoke thanksgiving morning to neck pain. thanksgiving was great--the food, the company, and relatively little stress. just a quick side note: just noticed relative and stress together. perhaps it should read: thanksgiving was great--the food, the company, and little relative stress. moving on... the neck pain persisted through the weekend. upon returning to work, the pain intensified (i was much more active at work than at home in my sedentary, turkey-induced comfort food lifestyle i enjoyed the four days prior). so the next day i went to the acupuncturist and the GP, and then went and got a deep tissue massage. excrutiatingly painful but in a hurts-so-good way. the asshole GP told me i slept funny and the pain would go away in a couple of days. but it didn't. so i went for another deep tissue, drank a lot of jameson, and rested the following weekend. i have experienced some relief but it is about the same as the first day it started. needless to say i called my GP's office again. first to express what a jerk he was and second to ask what i should do. so i went back to see the director of sports medicine who, upon assessing me, said i am really "locked up", have intense muscle spasms, need to start physical therapy, take flexiril, and continue with the deep tissue massages. and then asked me if i have been doing anything differently or have been stressed. nothing different; but stressed? sure. who isn't these days? my sad-enough-as-it-was-retirement-account has tanked while i am about to embark on the biggest purchase of my life. all the while trying not to think about the pain in my neck thus bringing on more stress and driving me to drink more jameson to sleep well at night. perhaps if i relaxed a bit more and channeled the other half's omnipresent optimism i wouldn't need blog therapy. or jameson. but then that's not very fun.

and so, in honor of the irish whiskey and it's relatively bearable hangovers, i offer the following recipe for beef and guinness stew:

ingredients

2 pounds stewing beef
3 tablespoons oil
2 tablespoons flour
salt and freshly ground black pepper
pinch of cayenne
2 large onions, coarsely chopped
1 garlic clove, crushed
2 tablespoons tomato puree, dissolved in 4 tablespoons water
1 1/4 cups guinness
2 cups largely diced carrots
sprig of fresh thyme
chopped parsley, for garnish

directions

trim the meat of any fat or gristle, and cut into 2-inch cubes. toss beef with 1 tablespoon of the oil. in a small bowl, season the flour with salt, pepper and cayenne. toss meat with seasoned flour. heat remaining 2 tablespoons oil in a large skillet over high heat. brown the meat on all sides. reduce the heat, add the onions, crushed garlic and tomato puree to the skillet, cover, and cook gently for 5 minutes. transfer the contents of the skillet to a casserole and pour half of the guinness into the skillet. bring guinness to a boil and stir to dissolve the caramelized meat juices on the pan. pour over the meat, along with the remaining guinness. add the carrots and thyme. stir and adjust seasonings. cover the casserole and simmer over low heat, or in a 300 degree F oven until the meat is tender, 2 to 3 hours. garnish the beef with parsley, and serve alongside boiled potatoes and a pint...or jameson.

looking to be underwhelmed for a little while

how is it mid-november already? where has the year gone? what's happened to my ever-growing list of goals? well, i am working on buying a house (though not a solo endeavor) while working on artwork while teaching while not going to yoga while feeling a bit overwhelmed. okay, a lot overwhelmed. but i am figuring it all out. figuring that if i went to yoga more perhaps i wouldn't feel so overwhelmed. figuring that these things i am working on are some of my goals, granted the self-serving ones. maybe not teaching but that provides me income to materialize the house, the art, and the yoga that i am not going to. argh! i am finding humor in it all as i write this. blog therapy. i'll just add to my to-do list: re-read this entry the next time i am feeling overwhelmed. until then, here's a recipe that will not overwhelm the cook because it is as easy as pie. wait. easier. and it goes well with the current resurgence of summer heat.

lemon-infused linguine with sauteed scallops

serves 2
large scallops (4-5 per person)
zest of 2 lemons. reserve lemons
1/4 c. really good extra virgin olive oil plus 2 tblspns
1/2 lb. linguine
1 c. arugula
salt
pepper

1. put large pot of water (for linguine) to boil
2. place linguine in boiling water. cook until al dente. about 11 minutes
3. rinse, pat dry scallops. season with salt and pepper
4. heat sautee pan with 2 tblspns olive oil over medium-high heat
5. combine lemon zest and olive oil in small bowl. set aside.
6. place scallops in sautee pan. cook for 2 minutes or until golden brown. turn and repeat.
7. drain linguine, return to cooking pot, and add arugula. stir to wilt arugula.
8. strain zest from olive oil through sieve, reserving olive oil.
9. divide linguine in two large bowls, top with scallops, drizzle lemon oil.
10. squeeze lemon juice to taste.

giving thanks in muffins

i absolutely love being in the kitchen making decadent dishes for the holidays, in particular thanksgiving; i can smell the turkey roasting now. i am so lucky to have a roof over my head and food-a-plenty each and every day. i never take it for granted but am reminded more than ever this time of year. so, in relation to my love of cooking and my thankful feeling i'd like to add two new goals to my ever-growing list...1) figure out a creative way to give back this holiday season (with the hopes of continuing it [i have a couple of ideas in mind and will write more when it/they come to fruition]); 2) include a recipe with every new post for the readers far and wide. the recipes will be based on what sounds good at the time, which is usually governed by the weather. for today's recipe the weather is sunny but very crisp with a gusty breeze...

orange-cranberry-walnut muffins (makes 1 dozen large muffins)

3 cups unbleached all-purpose flour
1 tablespoon baking powder
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
10 tablespoons softened, unsalted butter
1 cup granulated sugar, less 1 tablespoon
1 teaspoon grated orange zest
2 large eggs
1 1/2 cups plain, low-fat yogurt
1 1/2 cups chopped cranberries, fresh or frozen
3/4 cup chopped walnuts
additional butter for muffin tins

topping:
6 tablespoons butter, melted
1/2 cup granulated sugar
2 teaspoons sugar

1. adjust oven rack to lower middle position and heat to 375 degrees.
2. mix flour, baking powder, baking soda, and salt in medium bowl and set aside.
3. beat butter and sugar with electric mixer on medium-high speed until light and fluffy, about 2 minutes. add orange zest to butter-sugar mixture. add eggs, one at a time, beating well after each addition. beat in one-half of the dry ingredients. beat in one-third of yogurt. beat in remaining dry ingredients, in two batches, alternating with yogurt, until incorporated. fold cranberries and walnuts into finished batter.
4. butter 12-cup muffin tin. divide batter evenly among cups (about a large ice cream scoop per cup). bake until tops are golden brown, 25-30 minutes. set on wire rack, cool slightly.
5. melt butter for topping. combine sugar and cinnamon for topping in small bowl. using pastry brush, brush 1/2 tablespoon butter on muffin and dip muffin in cinnamon-sugar mixture. repeat.

six random things about me: a challenge in following rules

recently i was tagged by A @ Notre Vie Juteuse to play a little game. it seemed simple enough, and i was just thrilled that i was tagged to be a part of it. i read A's six random things and began thinking about mine. and then i re-read the rules and thought, oh shit. i don't know enough about blogging to be able to follow the rules. and then i thought, play the game anyway, the readers will soon understand.

first, the rules:
1. link to the person who tagged you.
2. post the rules on your blog.
3. write six random things about yourself.
4. tag six people at the end of your post and link to them.
5. let each person know they've been tagged and leave a comment on their blog.
6. let the tagger know when your entry is up.

six random things about me...

1. i have a very hard time following rules and listening to instructions. i have since i was a kid. now, i can do it when it comes to things like work, or i'd quickly be out of a job. but when it comes things like building the latest ikea bookshelf or playing a game, i'm more of a learn-as-you-go-by-experimentation-nonconforming type of person. for example, i am already off to a less-than-perfect, not-following-these-rules start as i don't know rule number 1 or rule number 4 of this game. did that stop me?

2. i would go barefoot all the time if i could...driving, teaching, running (or at least walking) errands. perhaps this is why i love yoga and all-things-beach so much. i really dislike my feet being encased in a shoe. too constricting.

3. i try to not repeat dinners i cook. this isn't to say i don't have favorites, i do. but going back to random thing number 1 about me, i am one to experiment. ironic, since with recipes there are set instructions. inevitably i change them.

4. i can never be warm enough. i love sleeping curled up in a ball, completely cocooned (head, too) in the covers. i love the hottest of showers. again, irony...in relation to random thing number 2...because no matter how cold or rainy it is outside, the other half questions, "where are your shoes?"

5. i wish i had a green thumb, as i love plants and flowers. i have a really bad habit of over-watering all house plants. certain death. evident as i scan the living room. that's what happens when the other half asks me to water. ahhh...see what happens when i try to listen to instructions?

6. i was raised by a father obsessed with cars. i am grateful for this, as i think i am fairly knowledgeable about car-related issues (like tire pressure, oil changes, mechanical issues, how to deal with mechanics, how to deal with salesman) at least in the stereotypical male perspective present when i have to deal with such issues. i feel empowered by my knowledge, silly as it may seem.

my entry is up. i am now going to figure out how to follow rules 1 and 4, or not.

things i should be doing instead

i should be doing other things (didn't i mention in the last blog entry i made a promise to myself to devote time to my artwork?). but i'd rather sit here in the cool, dark room, blogging. listening to background noise of the football game the other half is watching. listening to pip whine and fredo purr. enjoying the sound the keys make as i type. i don't want to do anything else right now. i am content typing in the dark with the glow of the computer to guide me (though i am sure an optometrist would scold me). as i sit here i am imagining it raining outside. kind of like the imaginings of a child. instead it was another cooker today; but i'll still think of rain. i should be cleaning out my book bag and purse, purging them of miscellaneous notes, and totally taking advantage of my new personal assistant, sandy (you might have heard of her). i should be locating my sample ballot so that i can vote on tuesday. i should be making lunches for tomorrow so i don't have to do it in the morning. i should be writing lesson plans so i am not scrambling to gather materials. i should be labeling the spices that i moved from the cabinet into the drawer (side labels are no longer useful). i should be finishing the last load of laundry from yesterday, returning phone calls, going to yoga, working on my art, planning the rest of the week's menu, and ordering my halloween costume. i'm not stressing; it will all get done. right now i'd rather sit here in the dark, listening to the rain.

monotype-maker's denial: mechanical reproduction is my immediate future

oh how many ideas i have floating around my head...especially now that i am kicking the "severe bronchial infection" out of my system. problem is, who has time to devote to seeing these ideas thru to fruition? with the 2 hour commute, various "chores" (dinner, paying bills, cleaning the house, groceries, the like), yoga (oh, and i'm not really doing that these days, at least not in the last three weeks), and catching up on life other than chores (that would be the other fun stuff. like napping, watching really bad tv--a total waste, i know, oh and blogging). i am sure i have left some things out. you get the idea. anyway, i am writing this mostly to make a written promise to myself that "i will set time aside each week to bring my concepts to life." a glimpse of what's to come...man vs. machine, part II. i figure that since i have succumbed to using technology to express my ideas in the virtual world, as well as the conceptual world, might as well continue it all in the real world. stay tuned...

what type are you? it's more than left brain/right brain...

so a few weeks back the other half came home with this personality test he had to take for work. this threw me a bit as i wondered the purpose of the test...to really understand the company's employees??? to determine how "crazy" one is??? to determine if the employee is in the right field??? who knows. he took the test, as required, and sent in the results. then on friday he went to a conference to discuss the results of the test, what it all means. i am still a bit confused as to the purpose of all of this. anyway, according to the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) test, he is an INFJ or Introverted-Intuitve-Feeling-Judging type. then he came home and was eager for me to take this test (i was a bit interested, but other things have taken precedence these days over understanding what type of person i already know i am). but i took the test anyway. i am an ESFJ or Extraverted-Sensing-Feeling-Judging type. what does this all mean to you? in a nutshell, the other half looks inward for answers and uses intuition to help make decisions while i am a tactile person and use the outside world to make decisions. this left me with, "well, okay. so which is better?" that's me. the answer-seeking competitor who quickly became frustrated with the plethora of information to disseminate and now just wants the other half to explain what it all means. you, on the otherhand, might be interested for other reasons...of course based on your type. i am sure this has left you with wanting to figure out that type, even though you already know. go on. take a similar version for yourself for free at: www.humanmetrics.com and click on jung typology test.

sick bed

i must get out of bed, and would if only i felt better. oh how i despise the deep cough, sniffly nose, sore throat, and overall exhaustion. since late monday afternoon, i think i have slept a total of something ridiculous like 35 hours, and it's only noon on wednesday, as a i write this from bed...thank goodness for wireless internet. am i hungry? thirsty? yes and no. i think i'll just go back to sleep...

those wascally wabbits...and other critters of note...

oil sensor light update...here goes...

i brought my car in for the light, asked what it could be, and was given three possibilities...one: the sensor went sour (not a common problem, but would be covered under warranty); two: i bottomed-out in my travels (um, yeah...NO); three: a rodent nibbled at my wires. ding ding ding! door number three won me a three hundred and sixty four dollar not-covered-under-warranty expense. apparently living out in the country (well it certainly ain't the city) brings with it living with country mice...or so i thought. my very nice service advisor told me about a woman who had this happen four times to her car (same model as mine) and it led her to extensive research...put a bag of potpourri in the splash pan (directly below the wiring harness that was nibbled) and the fragrance bouquet drives the critters away. well, i could have done this but was oh so worried about the sachet catching fire. this led me to my own extensive research (thank you fellow audi forum members who post TOTALLY unhelpful pics of cats armed with rifles--an apparent joke to kill the rodents--simply OUT OF THE QUESTION); such research options included moth balls (poisonous), fox urine powder (unavailable immediately), mouse traps (um, yeah...NO), or a very spicy cayenne pepper granule (i chose the latter and sprinkled it under my car last night). how did i choose this? well, according to my research, the rodent in question isn't such...it's a lovely little conejo (yes, i live on a street with conejo in the name, and fyi, conejo=bunny rabbit). thanks. apparently audi oil wiring uses soy in the plastic, an attractive feeding choice for my furry neighbors. hopefully (fingers, toes, arms, legs, eyes seriously crossed) this will fix the problem.

other critters of note...pip and fredo (aka total pains in the asses aka my cats)...why must fredo pee on the leg of the couch, right next to his litter box? because pip stinks it up! more research underway for this problem.

the challenge in the truth opposites attract (aka the allergy update)

so...it's only been two days since my last post, and oh what has happened! here's the update...i went to yoga saturday and then did a two hour yoga inversion workshop yesterday. upon leaving the yoga studio, my check oil light came on (okay, you're probably wondering what the hell this has to do with allergies). i couldn't drive my car today and the other half drove me to work and picked me up early to take me to my acupuncturist/allergist/all-knowing (for now) eastern medicine doctor/psychologist who i truly believes has esp...we'll call him "deal" (in so many ways, hopefully as in monetary, too, as health insurance covers him--for now). so the other half had expressed an interest in meeting deal, and whatd'ya know, the carpooling worked out. my 4:30 appointment turned into the other half getting an appointment, too, and we were there until 7 tonight! what does this all mean? what do i mean about the challenge in the truth that opposites attract? well, as in my previous posting i predicted that the other half would most likely have a whole slew of foods he can and cannot eat. and boy was i right! we are opposites in most nearly every single aspect of our lives (a whole other blog possibility), so it makes sense we are opposites in food. not the foods we enjoy (those are the same) but the foods that we can and cannot have. and now have i been charged with a serious task at hand of prepping breakfasts, lunches, and dinners that work for the both of us. for your reading pleasure, if you choose to accept the head-spinning complexities of chinese medicine, the following is what i have learned about myself, the other half, and what constitution/type we are.

what does all this constitution stuff mean? i am still trying to figure it out. according to deal i am a tai yang constitution and a shao yin type while the other half is a shao yin constitution and a tai yin type (more to come on this later). for these constitutions and types, there are specific foods to eat and certain ones to avoid. here goes...

i am to reduce by 80%: large amounts of land meat, eggs, wheat flour products, rye, dairy, watermelon, honeydew, cantaloupe, nuts, beans, mushrooms, root vegetables, zucchini, pumpkin, squash, olives, dark grapes, plums, peaches, bananas, pineapple, mango, strawberries, peppermint, flax, seeds, aloe, vitamins A, D, and E

the other half is to reduce by 80%: ocean-bottom seafood, eggs, pork, wheat, rye, iceberg and romaine, cucumber, buckwheat, watermelon, honeydew, cantaloupe, persimmon, strawberries, kiwi, mung beans, aloe, vitamins C and E, and green tea

i am to eat: buckwheat, rice, sprouted grains (non-wheat), tofu, fish, occasional land meats, lobster, clams, all things corn (starch, syrup, cobbed), tomatoes, potatoes, white grapes, cherries, apples, oranges, kiwi, seaweed, spices (ginger, cumin, curry, garlic, black pepper), green onion, dill, chives, green leaf vegetables, kale, honey, bee pollen, green tea, maple syrup, vitamins B and C

the other half is to eat: rice, soy, salmon, tuna, land meat, beans, all things corn, tomatoes, zucchini, pumpkin, squash, olives, root vegetables, dairy, pears, apples, lemons, peaches, plums, apricots, nuts, mushrooms, seaweed, spices, coffee, flax, seeds, cocoa, honey, bee pollen, maple syrup,vitamins A, D, and B.

so, yes, there are cross-overs. but the majority of contrasts of what he can eat compared to what i can eat are great. and so the challenge begins in kitchen stadium and i will prevail as the next iron chef (i mean cook).

auf wiedersehen rocky road

so much for my commitment to locally grown food (as for now). as of recently, i am to stay away from nuts and dairy and focus on buckwheat, rice, kiwi, cherry juice, and fish. how does this affect my farmer's market commitment? i am now challenged with devising meals using my new staples (as per my new allergist/accupuncturist), a tricky thing when i've never had buckwheat (if i have it didn't leave a lasting impression) nor have i ever cooked with it, and i have never made soba noodles from scratch--i do not have the time for this. so how do i know what meals to make? i don't but am currently researching this. so in the meantime i have made the trek to trader joe's and whole foods to buy my new staples. hoping to soon get an idea of meals, thus ingredients, thus my return to the farmer's market for most everything. oh, and my other half? well, he doesn't have the same allergic manifestations i have and according to the doc, is most likely affected by foods differently and will have a whole slew of his own personal meal ingredients (to be dteremined after his visit to the doc, if he so chooses thus starting something along the lines of if it ain't broke...); so my best estimation is that the other half will continue to eat whatever i cook and will now be on the same regimen as me. i, on the other hand, began seeing this new doc to relieve symptoms related to what i thought were seasonal allergies as well as to eliminate pain from a torn ligament in my right wrist. apparently my addiction to everything almond (the nut, the butter, the paste, the milk) as well as my addiction to everything dairy (the ice cream, the milk, the cheese, the yogurt, the cottage cheese, the butter) is the root of my symptoms and pain. the chinese elm tree on our deck which i was about ready to have uprooted, relocated, and replaced with something else--like a fake christmas tree--is just exacerbating the food allergies brewing within. and the pain in the right wrist which i was about to cast indefinitely (as surgery is terrifying) is inflamed due to the food allergies brewing within. so i am attempting to eliminate nuts (all, not just almonds) and dairy for the next two weeks to assess the improvements that my eastern medicine doctor guarantees. so far i am in 5 days. so far, so good. another note worth mentioning...i am a skeptic. big time. but i have to say, that after my first treatment of a total of 10 needles strategically impaled in various parts of my body, i noticed improvements. so i figure, hey, why not go for broke and see if weeding out the nuts and dairy makes my symptoms disappear. next up...treatment for depression from serious ice cream withdrawl.

perfectly controlled impulsive boredom

i am a control freak; i realize this. funny thing is, those around me might not (at least the ones who don’t know me well). i have a hard time letting someone else take the lead (unless i want them to—more control). it comes down to what I want to do, and when and how I want to do it—going places, buying things, processing opinions and ideas…it’s all just my impulsiveness really. is it better to be impulsive or controlling? are those two things interchangeable? perhaps it is perfectionism. another characteristic of mine. funny, too, this only relates to certain parts of my life—food, pedicures, dirt (or the lack of), aesthetics. even funnier still is my ability to relinquish control and perfectionism when it comes to my artwork—possibly stemming from my impulsiveness. leading me to believe that control and impulse are not interchangeable. my impulsiveness comes from the initial excitement and the imperfections come from the boredom that soon follows. if only I could (and perhaps others out there might agree, particularly those with similar characteristics) get paid handsomely for blogging—the perfect (no pun intended) forum for initial excitement/impulse, enabling both complete control and the ability to quickly move on the next idea once boredom sets in, thus starting the impulsive cycle all over again. all the while meticulously perfecting my words and ideas (and getting frustrated that though they make sense to me, it could be better written—or not…it’s my blog dammit). i’m in control here. now if i could only figure out how to change my fonts/font colors/font effects...it would be perfect.

photo credit:
Sarah Hobbs, Untitled (Perfectionist)

what is that?

lately i have received countless postcards, flyers, letters, and pamphlets (to name a few) about wedding shit. yep, shit. i think i've been punk'd. and the really sad part about all of it (well there's lots of sad parts, actually) is that this stuff is really bad. take for instance the letter i received today from some cake company in the valley (and don't get me wrong, i AM all about supporting local businesses) that is a complete throw-back to the 80s. the letter went something like this:

Dear (insert my name here):

Congratulations! We are so happy that you are getting ready to get married, and am sure your are just as happy about planning your wedding.

stop right there. they've got the wrong bride.

anyway, the letter continues and goes on and on about the wonderful cakes they have to offer for the special day (gag). so, i read on. why? i haven't a clue; it's exciting getting mail. i should have known not to open it by the looks of the really bad company graphic on the envelope (which, by the way, did not suggest it was a cake company); hey what can i say, i am opinionated about art. the letter closes with someone's signature and a contact number. and wait there's more. a second page. i would think it would show examples of wedding cakes. but no! it's examples of really really bad holiday cakes! a lopsided and grotesquely colored pumpkin, a cornucopia filled with real fruit, i think, a ghost cake, a banquet table with croquembouche, and additional info about holiday party cookie trays! clearly the guilty party who wedding punk'd me has not read my blog! other than the part about me supporting local business. i like art and food! and artful food. not the mundane. and i know this cakerie is trying to make it, but whoever they hired for advertisin needs to be fired...or at least given a stern talking to about demographics.

other sad points about the bombardment of wedding galore...too much paper! what a waste of money. they're wasting it on me, anyway, as i won't be supporting the company who offered to let me rent a vera wang gown for $250 or the company who wants me to hold a reception in some lobby that was photographed using really bad lighting and looked as though a spaceship was about to depart in the background. i guess i have found the niche for those who want to know where not to spend their money or their time.

but there is hope in all of this. what, might you ask? well this paper trail will not be wasted, rather reborn as art. i am embarking on some new artwork stemming from these gloriously tasteless mailings, perhaps the world's ugliest rendition of a wedding cake (see photo above).

at which point i will track down my punker and thank him/her/them...

i call it shrimp and quinoa and black beans and pineapple

i am thankful to be home. to be well fed. to be wearing comfortable clothes, have running water, electricity, a cozy bed, good things to read, a blog to have fun with, good friends, and love. these little life luxuries make the things i am not so thankful for (like traffic, litter, gas prices, snobs, cleaning the cat box...) a bit more bearable. they make me realize that i have it pretty good. things could be better, let's say in a place with no traffic or litter, but i'd still have to clean the cat box. i'd rather not talk about litter or the latter litter for that matter as a way to end this blog entry. so i'll close with tonight's dinner...an amalgamation of things recently purchased at the farmer's market. items i didn't think i would use together but have worked out really well for this evening. did you know you can buy shrimp and fish at the farmer's market? i didn't until i did. i haven't found a name for this dish yet, and i don't really know what geographic region it might best reside in...i'll have to think about that. for now i call it shrimp and quinoa and black beans and pineapple since that's pretty much all that's in it.

--cook 3/4 c quinoa in 1 1/2 c water for about 15 minutes.
--while that cooks, reheat about 1 1/2 c black beans on low adding a dash or two of ground cumin.
--in a saucepan, melt 1/2 tbsp. butter and 1/2 tbsp olive oil over medium heat. once butter is melted, add 2 cloves of finely chopped garlic. before garlic browns, add 1/2 lb. peeled/deveined shrimp. cook over medium low heat until bright pink, sprinkling with another dash of ground cumin. be careful not to overcook as the shrimp can get rubbery.
--right before the quinoa is done, add 1 c chopped pineapple (no this did not come from the farmer's market--i don't think pineapples or bananas grow in california) and the juice (about 1/2 c).
--spoon a generous serving of quinoa into a bowl. top with beans. top with shrimp. top with sauce from pan. top with salt. repeat in second bowl. serves 2.

was so yummy i scarfed it up without taking a picture, so you'll have to settle with the one posted here. similar to an evening in our house, except ken's usually the sous chef and i'd be the one in the apron (though i rarely don one). enjoy.

to do lists: a blessing in disguise

along with acronyms, my life revolves around to-do lists. why do i have so much to do? do i bring this upon myself? are these items really what i need to-do? such things include: pay bills, food shop (followed by a list of items, not all of which can be purchased at the same store--for example, there's the farmer's market list, the whole foods list, the cvs list), go to post office, clean out car (as i seem to live a good chunk of my life in there), go to yoga, call so and so, clean house, do laundry...and these are the daily to-do's...the ones before the bigger ones--follow-up on recent projects (i.e. home buying/mortgage brokering), work on a business plan, have a yard sale (including cleaning out storage)...and the even bigger ones--travel to greece, to italy, to france, to spain, to jamaica, to greenland, to sweden, to iceland, to south africa...

didn't i already blog about lists? goals? what's the difference between a goal and a to-do? for me, the immediate to-do's are check-offable...and the last entry on each one off my lists? check all other lists. as if i am going to forget to food shop or pay bills, leading me to believe that i do bring this work upon myself. at least for the time being i am avoiding my list (though addressing a goal) and leaving the dishes in the sink, the living room unswept, and the bills unpaid while i enjoy the now not-so-daily blog, as originally intended. perhaps if i gave up my to-do's, i'd be able to blog daily. but then really, who has that much to say? so to readers out there, be thankful for my to-do's or i just might be blogging about even more uninteresting stuff than i already am.

thank you bell laboratories

i live in a world of acronyms, initialisms, and alphabetisms. what's with these little creations? i decided to do a little investigative research and whatd'ya know, the use of the word acronym was formed by bell laboratories, formerly american telephone and telegraph company (aka at&t). guess bell grew tired of their own alphabetism--based on one's inability to pronounce at&t as a word? just a thought--and now we have a little word--that would be acronym--that describes the ridiculousness of abbreviating groups of word to make them pronounceable. oh this is making my head spin! so let's take a look at the acronyms, initialisms, and alphabetisms that have crossed my airwaves in very recent days...

MLT
CST
PLT
RFI
DSA
CNN
DVD
JPEG
COR
AAA
WWPO
PMC
D1/2/3/SI
CI
TED

and the list can go on and on...it's all getting a bit silly that we are getting a bit lazy. wtf?

school daze

i am a teacher. and having just started the school year, am reminded of the exhaustion felt immediately following the first few days. how quickly i forget, and every year at the start of school i ask myself if i felt this way last september...tired? stuffy nose? sore throat? body aches? and the september before that and the one before that and so on. and then i ask myself is it really the readjustment to school life or could it simply be seasonal allergies? and though i greatly enjoy teaching and find such pure joy from the idiosyncracies, humor, and innocent spirit of children, my current physical state sure makes me long for summer.

on the subject of art

if art is so subjective, why do art professors profess their objectivity? who's to say that one's art doesn't work? perhaps it isn't working for the professor as a subjective viewer. but when it doesn't work simply because it doesn't because the professor says so, well there lies the professor ar objector. as an art educator and as an art student, this idea of subject/object plays a large 2-part role: when helping students fine-tune their work as well as when i fine-tune my own work. with my students, i want them to find happiness in their work while also gaining an understanding of basic art principles, of why their art is effective but not to change it to please me or the observer. as a student myself, i find myself trying to please the professor. and i know why. because i am paying for continuing education. in order to receive a degree i need to produce work effective in their eyes, irregardless of my interests, my decisions within the medium, my subject matter. and the professor will look at the work and disregard it. not engage in questioning it. relay that the art should speak for itself. well, of course. thus speaking to the interpretation of the viewer and making it subjective. looks like where i teach and where i am taught are clearly expressing great differences in the philosophy of art and art education. where does that leave me? to keep teaching the way i want to be taught, to keep learning what i don't want to do, and to propel myself to doing what i do want to do.

flip flop

I live in flip flops and if I could go barefoot, I probably would. I KNOW how detrimental filp flops are to one's health...particularly back pain, foot pain, and who knows what else. Trouble is, there are no flip flops I've found that support the foot while looking great. This isn't to say that my flip flop collection is so super fabulous. But the ones I have, I love. I've been thinking of going back to a Birkenstock...the ones I lived in through most of high school and college. My concern, as an adult living in Los Angeles, is the look of the shoe. How superficial. Especially in light of all the other things I could be blogging about right now or focusing my energy on away from this computer of mine. The Birk makes a pretty stylish looking shoe, but is it what I am after? Which then makes me second guess it altogether. If I'm not sold immediately I give it some thought. Clearly I am giving it some thought. And still thinking about it, I haven't made a decision. It seems my mental state matches my fashion state. To flip or to flop?

to market

Okay...so I skipped a day of blogging. Yesterday was very busy, and today, more so but in a different way. We just finished dinner and I am proud to say that I don't often have many repeat items on the dinner line up. Frequent favorites include portobella mushroom sandwiches with a lemon/blue cheese/dijon dressing. So tasty! And roasted potatoes. Tonight's dinner was a roasted root vegetable salad with each ingredient coming from my trip to last Saturday farmer's market. Oh how I enjoy getting up and heading out the farmer's market between 8 and 9...leisurely spend an hour or so perusing the pickings...before coming home to unpack before heading to yoga. This habit has been rewarding for many reasons...1) financially because I buy only what will last for the week; the produce has not been treated with any fertilizers or preservatives and tends to spoil faster than regular store-bought produce. And the food seems less expensive than in the stores, seeing as it isn't imported and marked up...2) Also, the food is fresher thereby healthier as there has been less time since it was picked for the vitamins and nutrients to diminish...3) I am proud to be supporting local businesses (an on-going goal of mine)...4) by supporting local businesses the environment is taking less of a hit in terms of oil consumption to ship it...and 5) it's just plain nice to be in the open air looking at the varieties of food available and all the colors, as well as personally challenging my cooking abilities further by using only what's in season. Now I know some of you readers might be saying you've known the benefits of farmer's markets all along...and I have for quite some time...but it's only recently become a real passion/now tradition for me.

gustav, goals, and gameshows

I figure now that I started a blog over my oh-so-restful-making-me-overly-ambitious holiday weekend, I might as well keep up with it. Thank goodness Gustav passed. Now we just have to think positively about the remaining days of hurricane season. And assess what impact Gustav had on the Gulf. Just because it didn't leave the same impact as Katrina in scope, doesn't mean it left no impact whatsoever. Oh the Gulf... Next on agenda...donate more to the Arbor Day Foundation to plant native trees in the hopes of lessening the impact from the carbon emissions from the decaying trees that fell AND get someone to better effectively implement contraflow...why would people want to leave under a mandatory evacuation if it takes many, MANY, MANY hours to leave? With this in mind, I've decided to create a list of my big picture goals...and they're big...for me, at least. (The creation of this list stems from a conversation with a very good friend this morning...so thank you tw...if you're reading).

do more for humanity, particularly the united states (this includes supporting local businesses, planting trees, being an advocate for the arts in schools, better educating myself so i can better educate others,...) if anyone has any insight on how to become a philanthropist without having been born into millions, i'm all ears

read at least for 30 minutes a day, if not more (currently reading "The Billionaire Who Wasn't", perhaps this will give me insight to a career in philanthropy (for me, starting at the age of 30 in today's society...so far, insightful but not user friendly for application...i'm hopeful...is there "Philanthropy for Dummies" out there anywhere?)

go to yoga EVERYDAY. i LOVE it! the hard part for me is getting to a class near my house at the end of a busy day and a long commute before making dinner packing lunches cleaning up figuring out what to wear tomorrow so i don't have to do it in the morning before another long commute while also wanting to read for at least 30 minutes and become a philanthropist. 'nough said.

there are more goals which include working on my artwork, writing a book (sort of), going to the beach at least once a week, getting outside more, cataloguing my music (and adding to it), keeping up with this blog, carpooling, oh yeah, and buying a house IMMEDIATELY.

i guess i could check off "keeping up with this blog" and feel proud to have accomplished that goal for today at least. now i shall turn off the tv on which the the gameshow "wipeout" has been playing. granted, it's entertaining background noise, but come on, let's get real...who comes up with this stuff? 'nough said. now i have time to read.

the quiet

how i enjoy the early morning quiet of our neighborhood. particularly today's morning. the fog rolled in and so far it's still here. i can smell the sea air and the horses. some wonder why i live so far from work and ask how i make the 40 mile trek (each way) daily. i ask myself this, too. some ask "why not just move back to the westside?" this question frustrates me because though i do voice my anger/irritation/loss of patience about my commute, i so enjoy my life at the end of the day and the early morning quiet. and by the looks of it, my commute isn't awful, comparatively.

the beginning of a blog

so about my fascination with humankind...i guess it starts here. why are we (general, yes; but for the most part) as a society (westernized for that matter) so incredibly interested in the goings-on of others? particularly in the "information super-highway" sense ('member that descriptor?). i, for one, am indeed interested in what others do/say/think/feel but even more so as to why. i've never been a blogger but i am opinionated. so, might as well voice my thoughts like the rest of the bajillion other bloggers out there; to be included in the voyeuristic undertakings of those in the cyber world, and to bring my perspectives of the outside world here. who knows, maybe one of you (the readers) might just be feeling the same.

and so begins the blog...

let's start with the most recent significant event directly affecting me, as well as hundreds of thousands of others--hurricane gustav. my brother lives in new orleans and up until 2 days ago thought he would wait out this storm. bunker down. supply himself. could it be worse than katrina? he evacuated that time (and thankfully so) but his house (also thankfully) was untouched. so this time 'round, he figured he wouldn't flood, he'd endure hurricane force winds, but could do it. until yesterday. having been tracking the storm, the deciding factor for him was how gustav would travel around cuba. instead, it traveled over cuba. and my brother packed up his car with his 3 cats and left for northern mississippi at 3 in the morning. a normal 2 hour drive took 7 before he arrived at his destination, exhausted but thankful...that he had some place to go. but what about all the others. as i sit here and write i am at a loss for words on how to describe the enormity of what i am feeling/thinking. funny, because just a paragraph ago i made note of my opinionated self. perhaps michael moore summed it up best in his "letter to god"...enlightening, frightening, and damn good.

http://www.michaelmoore.com/words/message/index.php?messageDate=2008-08-31